Walk Away


I look back on what happened between us

Only occasionally

When the right song comes on

Bringing the far away

Deep in thought

Look to my eyes

 

It’s almost like feeling for a ghost

An amputated portion of my life

A limb lost

To moments lived

So long ago

 

I went through the motions

The hurt, disbelief, anger

The forgiveness

And now moving on

 

I can no longer pretend to ever understand

Why you walked away

I just know

I wanted us more

 

At some point I stopped asking why

Coming to peace with our goodbye

I moved onto new love

Then here you come

Your words contradicting

The picture your actions paint

 

I know this crossroad

A choice I must make

With my hand raised

To his lips for a gentle kiss

The far away look is washed away

 

I choose my path

To take his hand

and from you

This time, I walked away

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The Right Choice


I’ve been down this road before.

Different places,

Different faces,

The same decision.

Do I keep trying?

Do I forgive the heartache?

Or do I forgive myself?

Do I heal and move on?

I have been here

So many times before.

I felt ignorant

For making the same choice

Over and over

Yet, expecting

Different results.

So this time

I made the right choice.

I made my peace with our history.

I kept those memories tucked away

When you came this way.

I stomped out those embers

And chose different.

This time I moved ahead

Glad that lesson

Is finally over with.

Can’t Compare


What I have here with you,

Can’t be compared,

To anything I’ve dealt with before.

Illusion has been swept away.

Bringing me finally,

To this day.

I see now the difference,

From the infatuation,

The passionate lust,

And what is real.

I used to feel an overwhelming desire,

To let my feelings be known.

A fear secretly grasping at my joy.

Reminding me that this wouldn’t last.

That I would eventually lose this company.

Words would spill over the edge,

Petal to the metal of the relationship.

Every overture available used.

Just to express the passionate feeling.

Lust and fear mistaken as love.

That much more tender,

With the walls and gates lowered.

Only in an effort to feel.

In effort to find the only piece missing.

Now I see and feel much clearer.

The others playing as teachers for my heart.

Showing me to recognize the truth of your company.

Old fears are easily dismissed.

The true feeling is finally here.

Brought to the forefront.

It’s easily seen by your simple actions.

The words sit on the corner of my lips.

I feel the phrase pass between us when we kiss.

These words unspoken,

Can’t be compared

To those spoken so freely by others.

I know I will hear them,

When the time is right.

I know when I do,

The meaning will hold more weight,

Than when they have ever been said before.

You couldn’t ever be compared

To anyone before.

They were never the one,

I was waiting for. 

The People We Meet


Every path,

Every schedule change,

Every slight detour

Has the potential

To lead to something amazing.

Chance encounters

Followed by mystic events

Bringing us

Surprising gifts

In the people

We meet.

Missed appointments,

Delayed plans,

All tend to put us

In each others paths.

I can clearly see

How small changes

Small schedule mishaps,

Have brought you

Right here

To me.

A simple bus ride,

A lost application,

A last-minute invite.

All of these things

Influencing

Where we have been

And the people we meet.

Fading Memory


Small town

Making it hard

To hide

To leave

Unfinished business

Far behind

Shoved away

Out of sight

And out of mind

Forced to face

Moments

From the past

Ghosts

Emotions

We choose

To ignore

In an attempt

To move on

In life’s

Infinite ways

To force us

To grow

And deal

With these

Vulnerabilities

Insecurities

And hurt

Eventually

The lesson

Is learned

In the time apart

My rose-colored glasses

Have been removed

No longer blinded

By my once

Great love for you

Now

It’s no longer

About disappearing

To move on

It’s about

Staying right here

Where

I have always belonged

Now as I grow

Becoming my best me

You become a faded face

In the background

Fitting

Like a fading memory

Ease The Slack


With every moment

Hour

Day

I contemplate

On what I said

What I did

 

What was I expecting?

For what

Was I hoping?

 

Was it

For the magic

To continue?

For it to grow?

 

Second thoughts

Giving

My mind a row

Tumbling through

Ego talking

Like it knows

 

Freezing my heart

I left on my sleeve

Looking

For a little warmth

Just a hug

To ease some slack

On this rope

Tied from mind to heart

As this

Possible future

And Past hurt

Tug of war

Wages on

 

 

**This was originally written on 6-26-2011**

Never Fade


Single tear

Travels

From the outer corner

Of my eye

Sight

Gently blurring

With this small ache

Pulling

At my heart

Contracting

Threatening to rip

At the seams

I just couldn’t

Imagine

What my life

Without you

Would be

I may not

See you

All the time

We may not speak often

Nor say goodnight

But my love

It runs deep

Part of my bones

I hope you know

No matter

Where I go

I always imagine

You there

When I come home

Family

A bond

I would never trade

A love

That will never fade